post 1: is the internet a "real place"?

aka the internet being a third secret place that exists in our brain.

ps.: take all these posts with a grain of salt. these are all ramblings from a very stupid weird person online.

cw: unreality?

so. as you can see i'm obviously a lain fan. i was reading this blog analysing lain, and was thinking about how the internet nowadays is kind of an actual space within the minds of many young people.

in lain, there's this place called the wired. i'll let the blog explain it better than i ever could:

"A consensual hallucination (as in William Gibson's description of the Matrix in Neuromancer). We all agree (more or less) to share (more or less) the hallucination that is the Wired. Meaning, how much each person agrees to hallucinate the Wired will vary, and furthermore, each person's hallucination will vary (more or less) from the statistical average "consensus Wired."

now, i've noticed that within the younger generation, the internet is an actual place. it is somewhere where a part of our identities and or persona exist within, a place where you can be either free as you want to be or extremely confined to your ideas of what people would want you to be.

the internet is what we call a virtual "third place". that is, a place where you socialize and interact with others. how much of that is real and present in your mind depends on how chronically online, and honestly how much you grew up with the internet i think.

now what do we make of that? what do we make of this third place, that exists and doesn't exist at once, just 1s and 0s in front of you that create something real inside your mind?

i dont think its that different from reality. what we see is what our brain makes us see, anyway. our interpersonal relationships are extremely important to us, but whether we form them online or not doesn't really matter to our mind and our hearts. is the distinction between reality and the virtual space we made for ourselves, so vast after all?

i think you just can't be so chronically online you're completely detached from real life... but also, having a community and socializing on the internet can help a lot during these lonely times.

after the pandemic, i feel like the effect only got stronger. i wonder what else will change with time, on how we view the internet.

anyways, just some thoughts i've been having... hopefully this makes sense? sorry to start off like this, buttt in compensation the other entries i've written already are pretty silly?

i should be studying but i'm writing this blog. silayyy

post 2: talking about ocs and shit

so i'm quite bad at making OCS. i don't know how to write. i don't even really know how to draw or do anything i just wing it every time. but! i'm cringe and i'm free so i'm gonna talk about my silly ocs for a bit.

i mostly make OCS for DND. thought these two that i'm gonna show here were not played and are just kind of living in my brain now. i have a general vibe and story that i'm thinking about for them... but i'm not sure exactly what i'm gonna do, ngl.

Nova Mirimm

she's a DND oc i made for my girlfriend's campaign that i ended up playing just once unfortunately. she's lowkey a critical role self insert (we were playing a critical role campaign, lol) but she kinda just stayed in my brain after i played and then turned kinda morally grey with time lmfao

she's a dunamancy wizard drow. i typed her as ENTP 7w8 because i enjoy typing my OCS to help with their personality... if this means anything to you sorry if its contradictory somehow.

very serious when in command, she's the one of the head wizards who works under the bright queen. adopted into a prestigious drow family, a kryn dinasty den, she's destined to be reborn under the light of the luxon, going through consecution.

nepotism baby. but everyone in the kryn dynasty is tbf. pretty low rank at first but trying to riseeee up. used to recruit people into the kryn army earlier in her military carreer, mostly focusing on working with magic and dunamancy agaisnt the empire now tho.

with friends, she's mostly playful and conspiratory. can be kind of a manipulative dick to people she thinks 'deserve it'. likes to mess with people. she cares inside, though.

kinda doomed bro #stopbeinginsane ur literally gonna suffer a terrible fate or whatevers

her characther is kinda just existing in my mind right now ... she wouldn't really make sense if i were to write her genuinely only if i could actually play her in a campaign i think i could get into her brain fr. but for now she's just gonna run around in my brain and be fun to draw and be kinda a mary sue or something!

Lyra Shadowsong

i made her because i like firbolg and i like deer and i wanted to make a deer firbolg.

grave domain cleric = worships raven queen. INFJ 2w1.

originally from wildemount, she went to xhorhas to escape her weird ass protective family. ended up making the way up in society by just being a really good cleric and also niceys to everyone. working with nova with her research, since extending life span is something she's also interested in. (working with the luxon and dunamancy involves time shit)

mostly shy but very astute and empathetic/sympathetic. can read people easily, but doesn't really know how to read her own emotions. friendly but is very defensive when it comes to her personal life.

very afraid of death but at the same time very fascinated by it. wants to work on life expansion / better quality of life improvements using magic basically.

kind of dependent on other people but pretty lonely at the same time.

she also runs around in my brain and is there chilling. maybe one day i will do something with them or actually write them well... who nose. go my yuri

oh yeah UTDR

post 3: talking about my current hyperfix, deltarune and undertale, mostly fandom projects

after watching the 10th anniversary stream, i think i've been kinda in my feelings about UTDR. it's crazy that its been in my life like. for most of it. i used to make shitty comic dubs as a kid... good times, think.

i think UTDR truly is the fandom where i'm mostly like i'm cringe but i'm free. i've realized like... in the end... being cringe isnt the end of the world. lol. like thats just part of myself, people can either like it or not.

anyway! actually this blog post is gonna be about fandom projects for UTDR fandom and some other cool things i've found online (i'll update this with time, i think... probably.

random UTDR fan stuff i enjoy, without organization sorrrryyy:

my current favorite AU has to be underfell. i was never really in the AU scene when i first got into UT, but i think being free of the cringe feelings has made me appreciate it a lot more. it's a lot of fun!

another fun one is coffin spam au i think. i really enjoy horror or tragic AUS so this is right up my alley tbh tbh

there's this really cool and creative kriselle snowgrave fangame which made my brain light up like a christmas tree because its the exact kind of thing i enjoy lmfao. really recommend it.

image_friend shimeji look at him please the fucki

fairly recent addition as of today (28/09/2025), this really interesting ramb arg that has its own game. it's really cool and also on neocities soooo hell yeah

this person makes deltarune themed cursors and they're really well animated and cool

there's a tenna dating sim being made we are so fucking back honestly.

sick deltarune sites:

that's all for now. i'll add more later i think. if you like utdr pls become my friend ok bye!